The opposite of letting go.
When my life is in “control” I have this illusion of peace, which is convenient because that’s how I like life to be…peaceful, even if it’s just an illusion.
I’m amazed at how far I’ll go to hang on to that illusion, trying with all the tricks I have up my sleeve to fix a situation. To “fix” my body. To “fix” someone else.
All because I want control.
In the past few weeks God has graciously arranged one thing after another over which I have no control. I would throw my head back and laugh hysterically at the clarity of it all if it wasn’t me learning the lesson.
There have been several situations that were out of my hands from the beginning. And then there were a few things caused by my own stupidity or my own sin. Whatever the cause, when it was all said and done, I found myself in exactly the same place…out of control.
Apparently this is where God wants me hanging out right now.
My sweet friend Vicky is in a monumental battle with breast cancer. She’s teaching me so many things as she shares her journey on her blog: Westra World. This week she said this when talking about her new treatment:
Her words sang soft in me yesterday, answering unspoken questions.
I can only say them truthfully when I stop trying to figure out my next move. When I quit trying to manipulate someone or something to fit into my agenda.
When I cease striving and allow myself to…
Today my friends, I’m resting in the land of ‘out- of-control’ and praying prayers for peace over my life and over each of you…