“You do the yard and keep the house clean and decorated…but do you ever sit back and enjoy it?”
This is what my friend’s husband said to her recently. Her answer? “No. No, I don’t have time for enjoying it.”
This is sad to me. Sad but not a terrible problem to have from my perspective. If she’d let me I could show her how to find time to keep her fun-meter in the red. I could rearrange her schedule and help her say NO to some of her obligations. I’m not bragging. It’s just true. It’s a gift. And a curse. You see, I have the opposite issue…I have a HARD time NOT sitting back and enjoying…
I’m the queen of fun things. I can’t run an errand without sneaking in a Starbuck’s run, just to make it fun. I have grocery day and I swing by an antique store. Doctor’s appointment? Okay, but after wards I’m driving through Dunkin Donuts for 3 doughnut holes and a coffee. When I worked, I worked some nights. The Husband would meet me after work many nights for a late dinner or even a movie. When I homeschooled my four kids I couldn’t stand just doing our lessons at home. We’d all get ready and go to the library some mornings and do the work there. (Why, I wonder, did I think that was more fun?)Then we’d go to lunch before heading home. Some days I’d just declare it a reading day and we’d spend hours in a book store picking out a few new books before heading home to lay around and read all day. I had to stop homeschooling…I’m too out of balance…ya think???
All that to say, I wish not stopping to enjoy my life was my issue. My issue is doing the not so fun stuff. Thats where I hit the wall…I hate to clean house. HATE IT! I have to make lists and plan “cleaning days” and put on the ipod and crank up either John Mayer or an audio book from Audible.com in order to get me through the cleaning process.
If I had my friends problem I’d say things like this: “I’m so sorry. I’m in therapy for being too productive, don’t bother me today with anything un-fun.” I’m sure I’d be great at learning to have fun. Not so much at being productive.
What about you guys? Are you super productive? Do you have an easy or tough time keeping your fun meter in the red? My “issue” with fun is causing me a bit of a problem lately. It’s not a serious issue…I’m going to talk about it soon.
Love to you Peeps…and for the love of pete, it’s Thursday…do something fun today.
don’t feel bad about having too much fun… i used to infuse fun into everything, too. now you’re just doing double the fun to make up for my lack of it. think of it as a way to balance out the universe! 🙂
.-= gitz´s last blog ..Rambling… =-.
You are the best!! It’s Thursday and I am going to have fun today!! My problem is staying focused on daily things like cleaning, etc. I would rather do something fun any day! 🙂 This housewife stuff is fun, if I wouldn’t have to clean! LOL!
.-= Chele´s last blog ..It’s a Blogwarming Party! =-.
I HAVE to keep my fun meter in the red. Part o f my fun meter, no make that a large part, is riding by bicycle all over creation. I try to ride at lunch time and take a little extra time so I can get in the miles I want (20-30). I ride by myself usually and at times will find someone else to ride with. I also have grass to cut but don’t find that as part of my fun meter. Thanks for the reminder Robin.
.-= bill (cycleguy)´s last blog ..This Explains a Lot =-.
This is one of my favorite things about you.
WWRD. What would Robin do?
I love this post. I need this post. Yeah, it feels a little foreign to me to purpose to have fun when there’s so much work to do. But perhaps, just perhaps, fun is every bit as important as work.
You always were the fun mom! Why do you think all of our friends always wanted to be at our house?? You even let us have friends sleep over on school nights so we could study for tests, it doesn’t get much better than that as a middle school girl :). The only really un-fun thing I recall from being homeschooled was having to prepare a presentation on the first Thanksgiving and having to present it to the entire extended family while dresse up like a pilgrim. Totally un-fun as a kid but I gotta hand it to you, probably loads of fun for all of the adults to watch us…. I love you!!!
I guess I’ve never thought of it this way. Yes, I do the fun things as often as I can incorporate them. But I usually think of them as treats or rewards for having done my work. I struggle on days I haven’t accomplished much, i.e., no work = no play. So I think I should adopt Julie’s little acronym… WWRD, that is a brilliant idea.
.-= Vicky´s last blog ..Ironman 2009 =-.
I hate housework too! Listening to audible book s is a great idea to help make that chore a little more bearable. I just recently discovered the joy of audible books thanks in part to “Book Radio” on XM radio. Thanks for the fun tip!
.-= Lisa´s last blog ..Cowboy Supper =-.
I love to look at the house and yard when the work is all done and admire it. I just don’t like doing it. I need a balance of both fun and work. Good for the soul. Hugs, Marty
.-= Marty´s last blog ..Tablescape Thurs. – Provence of France =-.
Your poor friend! I wish she was more like you! I bet she would say the same thing. She would more than likely confess that she’s always wanted to more like you for more reasons than even this. For me, I would say Bethany, Stephanie, Tim and Emma all have the greatest memories of how you made so many days special. They probably remember the warmth and security of their home, and not if it was dusted, vacuumed, or picked up. I think yours is not a problem, it’s a gift.
Deb~
Deb…I could help my friend. If only she wanted help… 🙂
i have to admit that my answer would probably be similar to your friend’s. i was raised by parents with high expectations for the cleanliness standard for their abode, and i grew up thinking that everyone was washing their floors on their hands and knees–washing once, rinsing twice–each monday. as a result of that cleaning regimin i was part of, i do not do much more than sweep and occasionally dust. i still, however, have a hard time with the fun meter.
my husband used to call me “the squasher” because i’d stomp on fun ideas without even knowing i was doing it. i see this in my friends too. there’s so much to do each day and week that they do not take any time for themselves. if they did, who knows what might not get done. i teach people to make greeting cards, and it’s getting harder and harder to find people who will commit to their sanity by setting aside some time for nurturing creativity and just “me time”.
i think you should be the ambassador for the fun meter, and offer advice on how to go about stressing less about the physical and focusing more on the intangibles. that’s where joy comes from, right? pursuing the intangibles.
i HATE to clean the bathroom, but they must be done. i also have card stock to cut, which is probably what i’ll choose to do instead of cleaning.
.-= jenn´s last blog ..So Long, Farewell =-.
Didn’t Bebe just pay you the highest possible compliment!! That was worth a million bucks, Bethany.
Thanks, Vicky. Let’s start repeating it. WWRD. WWRD.
I love this post, Robin. More, please!!
Another great post Robin! I can totally relate to choosing the fun thing over the not-so fun thing. That often gets me in trouble, but brings me a lot of joy, too. I didn’t know you homeschooled 4 kids! That’s so cool. (Amazing, too.) I do need to learn to infuse more fun into my son’s lessons. That’s one area where I tend to get into the “gotta get it done, so we can check it off the list” mode. Not so fun. I’m going to really work on that this year….er, that doesn’t sound right. Let me rephrase that. I am going to really look for more opportunities to make his education more of an adventure and less of a “to-do” list item. There. That’s better. Thanks for the inspiration!
.-= Joanie @ The Bright Side´s last blog ..fur baby #2 and a half =-.
The problem with cleaning and dusting is “You have to do it again and again and again and again.” Can you tell I DON’T like to clean anymore? You dust and it comes back a few days later. A clean house is nice and I admire people who are dedicated to keeping theirs that way. I would rather go visit my twin granddaughters and play games with them. That is more fun than vacuuming
I walk a mile every morning, go out to eat once a week with two girlfriends and spend time sitting on my front porch enjoying the first sign of sunrise. That saying about Stop and smell the roses is very true. Don’t get so busy you miss the “Good Stuff”.
I ride a fun/production pendulum. I have tried to strike a balance. Sometimes I find it for a little while. Then I’m side-t0-side again.
What I listen to when I clean depends on my mood. Sometimes music, sometimes Learning Spanish Like Crazy, and sometimes a podcast (love the Crosspoint.tv stuff!).
.-= Anita´s last blog ..My Life as a Real Person =-.
I think this is my very favorite blog! I can’t think of you without thinking of fun! My face is smiling as I write! I love you.
I am so unfocused to the “Homemaker Role.” I too make multiple fun stops. Going to the kids doctor is an all day trip. I purposefully kept it kinda far away and in a fun area of town! We go to the mall, Starbuck’s, Specialty Market with tons of samples, Toys R Us, the Dollar Tree (sucker for those stores), and there are 3 craft store within 2 minutes of each other. All before and/or after the appointment. My kids love going to the doctor…lol. Well, except for the shots 😉 I just think life is too short to constantly be cleaning. My mom was super organized and clean. We would clean after we cleaned. I do miss that super clean feeling. But, I don’t miss the stress involved with the upkeep. I’m a timer girl now. Set it when I don’t feel like cleaning for 15 minutes. Works everytime and it’s amazing what you can get done in that 15 minutes!
I love this! I’m with ya on the starbucks and/or munchkin run – anything like that to pep up a day is great! And, I so HATE cleaning – I’ll do anything to get out of having to clean – would much rather spend time with friends or the family that do some of the things I “should” be doing.
.-= Vanessa´s last blog ..Keeping it Real =-.