If you’ve been hanging out with me for long, you know I choose “one-word” for every year, some of you do too.
For the past 5 years I’ve written a lot here on the blog about my one-word, but this year I’ve been kinda puzzled. Some of you have asked me about it and I’ve been looking back through my prayer journal to help me remember what I discovered about abiding.
Abide is my word for 2013.
The word abide conjures up a sense of place and a feeling of deep serenity in me, like that feeling I get when I step into my house after being gone on a trip…home.
This is not however, exactly what I’ve experienced with this word in the past 8 months. In the coming weeks, as I go back through my journal and gather the harvest from these past months I’m going to share with you. I’d love to talk about what you’ve learned in the past year through your one-word. (And if you didn’t pick one, would you think about maybe choosing one for next year? To read more about how one-little-word can change your life go HERE)
In March I went with my daughter Bethany and her husband Darren and precious 2 year old Hartley to Breckenridge. Darren and Bethany were going to ski while Hartley and I planned to play in the snow and drink hot chocolate! The house was nestled into the side of a snowy mountain, which was a dream because you know, I LOVE snow. But shortly after we settled in Hartley got horribly sick. The three of us doted on her that first 24 hours because truly she was pitiful. The next day I got sick. How can I tell you how sick I was? I’ve never in my memory been that sick. EVER. The kind of sick where I called The Husband in the middle of the night to see what he thought about me calling 911. Bethany and Darren were 2 floors up and I couldn’t pick my head up…
But really, that wasn’t the issue. The real issue is that I don’t travel much. Like almost never. I tend to be secure in my space and leaving really makes me anxious. (major understatement) So when I got sick, I kept waiting for panic about not being at home to ensue. Waiting to feel overwhelmed with the urge to get back to The Husband. But every time the thought: I’ve gotta get home, entered my head, another thought quickly followed, I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be...
Looking back on that time in Breckenridge, I wrote in my journal:
“I think sometimes to abide simply means the absence of struggle on my part, because no matter how difficult things are, I’m trusting that I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be…”
I know some of you won’t understand how significant that is because you’re sure …sure of your place in the world…sure of your choices. But I fight a thousand nervous thoughts about absolutely everything, so this lesson in abiding, was not a feel-good lesson but it was big for me.
If you chose a word for the year, can you think of anything you’re learning from your one-word?
Sending love my friends