I’m a glass-half-empty, worst-case-scenario kind of gal. You know, one of those people who can find a storm cloud in every rainbow.
If ever you think your life is going great and you have nothing to worry about, call me. My brain will fire off issues of concern faster than a machine gun round. On a bad day I’ll give you the list. But on a good day, I’ll cheer you on. And happily most days are good days.
I remember when I got weary of all the negative verbiage leaking into my life. It was twenty seven years ago. The Husband and I had just gotten married. He and I and my three very tiny babies. I woke early one morning before anyone else. Tiptoeing through The Husband’s house that I was just starting to make our home, I cradled a mug of hot coffee and breathed deep my new life. Toys in baskets next to the fireplace, my two tiny girls cuddled in one bedroom and Baby Timothy in another, while The Husband, our knight in shining armor, hit the snooze button putting off the inevitable work day.
Looking back on that time I still marvel at the wonder of it…How did I get from being a single mom in full panic mode, to a wife and mother living peaceful?
Over and over I had screamed it to anyone who’d listen, my list of worst-case-scenarios for my life…
“How will I ever take the kids on vacation by myself?
How will I teach them to ride a bike and play baseball?
How will I give them a good life when I have no college degree and no marketable skills?
What will I do about insurance ?
What will I do when they’re all sick at the same time? How can I care for THREE babies all by myself?
I’m not even 25 and my life is out of control! I have NO HOPE!!!!“
I don’t remember any of the advice I got from friends and family, but I do remember the light-bulb moment that morning, newly married, tiptoeing through the house as everyone else slept…
My list of worst-case-scenarios…never materialized. Not one of them.
In the 27 plus years since then, my brain has spit out a million more worse-case-scenarios. Sometimes I’ve verbalized them to someone and other times I’ve kept them between God and myself. Mostly, I’m happy to say, they never happened. And mostly I’ve learned not to expend my energy and give over my peace of mind to the what-if’s.
But you and I both know, that sometimes the worst does in fact happen. For our family the worst has occurred in the form of marriage problems, the bottom falling out of our finances, a battle with cancer that took my little brother, and Mama never leaving the hospital after a simple procedure. What then? What if one of my worst-case -scenarios actually happens?
The truth is, all the worry in the world wouldn’t have prepared me for those times. When they came, God gave me a measure of grace for that moment. The grace didn’t take away the pain or make a tragedy disappear but it did give me the strength to put one foot in front of the other and do the next right thing.
My mind still spits out worst-case-scenarios but I seldom waste time and energy in panic mode because He’s been faithful in the past and I am learning to trust Him with the future.
Are you a glass half empty or a glass half full kind of person my friends?