“All appears to change when we change.”
~Henri Amiel
The Husband and I have been visiting the Florida panhandle every summer since we got married 26 years ago. We’ve stayed at several places over the years but our favorite by far, is Rosemary Beach.
Last week,for the seventh year, we said good bye to summer at Rosemary. Although we stay in a beach house that isn’t ours, Rosemary feels like home to us, it’s part of our story. The beach, the restaurants, the flicker of gas lanterns over every front door…the same every year.
But this year felt different.
Walking along the shore under gray clouds pregnant with rain, we talked, The Husband and I, about years past and how time flies. We’re getting older after all and things are changing.
“There’s a lot about getting older that bothers me” I confessed. “But there are some good things too. Like for the first time at the beach, I’m completely unconcerned about my looks.”
He glanced at me suspicious, “is this a trap? I’m afraid to respond”.
It wasn’t a trap. It was in fact a miracle. In years past lounging on the beach or at the pool was sometimes less than relaxing. Instead of enjoying the sand, the sun and my family, in my mind, I was in an all-out battle. Between berating myself for the way I looked, comparing myself with other women and planning my next drastic diet, I had no focus left for enjoying the moment.
By the time I left the beach I could hardly wait until autumn when I could wear layers!
But not this year. At fifty-one, I finally have a semblance of serenity in the body God gave me. I was blissfully unaware of myself which made every other detail and every other person come into sharp focus. This year it was easy to be fully present in every moment.
I’ve prayed for this thousands of times throughout my life but it was worth the wait.
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~My Sweet Friends, I so hope you don’t think less of me hearing of my petty struggle with body image~Just keeping it real as always~
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Is there a struggle that you’ve prayed over and over about? Hang on dear ones, your answer will come.
Sending love
Thanks, Robin for your open heart! I can only relate too well. Around fifty I felt the release of concern about me and was so at peace. Ah, the blessings of older age.
You my friend will never cease to be beautiful, inside and out!
Jane, isn’t it bliss to forget yourself??? I wonder if 50 is that magic age? love u
Robin, I have felt the EXACT same thing for 44 years now. Brian was a 10 lb, baby born by cesearean and I have had that scar up my belly ever since so never could wear a bikini since age 20. I have STRUGGLED with body image ever since. Joe’s parents lived in Fl. so every vacation all these years has been to there. I feel your pain, sister. I am so glad you can finally rwlax. I doubt I ever will. I also CRAVE Fall to be able to cover up again……XOXO
Pinky, oh my friend, I wish you knew how much you inspire me. Your sense of style and your creative energy…sending you love. (those babies really do a number on our bodies don’t they!!!???) xo
Oh, Robin, this is so beautifully done. I love the quote, the picture, your honesty, your sweet words with The Husband.
Right there with you, relaxing into change. Thank you!!
Julie, I love that: relaxing into change. That’s exactly the feeling! xo
I, too, have always struggled with enjoying the beach b/c I was sooo worried about how I looked in a bathing suit. Thank you for posting this. I hope that, in time, I become comfortable in my own skin, too.
Anna, saying a prayer for you God will continue to open your eyes to how very beautiful you are-He is able my friend~ xo
Good word! I turned 50 in April and while this year has not been anything I expected (death of my father and major health and living issues for my mother and my husband’s mother) there is a sense of settled-ness that comes with 50. As Popeye said, “I (y)am who I (y)am!” I think having a focus on thankfulness has also made me aware that there are so many things to be thankful for and worrying about my looks in a bathing suit or shorts is NOT worth the effort. I exercise, I try to eat healthy whole foods, I won’t be a size 2 but I am in a good place. That is worth being thankful for and worth enjoying the moment!
Jenny, what a difficult year you’ve had…I’m so glad you’re feeling settled and in a good place…cheers! xo
Beautifully written post, Robin. I find myself so much more relaxed in my fifties than I ever was before. It is so nice to enjoy my surroundings more than comparing myself to everyone else. That does not mean that I don’t care about my appearance, I just accept it more. xxxooo
“Some people, no matter how old they get, never lose their beauty – they merely move it from their faces into their hearts.” ~Martin Buxbaum
Eileen, I love the way you put it, “it’s not that I don’t care about my appearance, I just accept it more” that’s exactly how I feel
xo (love the quote)
We all have some type of struggle… None of us are immune because satan is a liar and deceiver and wants to rob us of all joy. So glad for your break through and sharing it with us. 🙂 I know I can relate and am sure most women can. 🙂
Gina, isn’t it the truth about all of us having some kind of struggle…and most of us keep them buried … xo
oh my goodness, what a fantastic gift! so happy for you and for the time you had away. to have time to walk and talk on the beach…sigh. sounds blissful!
glad you’re home though, ’cause it means we might, just might, see each other some time soon!
thankful for answered prayer.
Jenn…yes it’s a gift and I’m looking forward to seeing you soon xo
Oh, I pretty much struggle with that body image thing, too – all the time. Or I’m worrying about my hair, my clothes, feeling somehow dissatisfied with how I look. And I hate that I do it, even as I am doing it! Sure, there are moments when it doesn’t encroach and I feel “comfortable”, but it seems to keep following me around – and I’m the same age as you. I was doing better until my image started popping up in advertising for my business – you know – business cards, flyers, print ads, and even on billboards. Lately, I focus on my appearance more and more when I leave the house. Definitely something I need to work on and overcome, or it’s going to eat me alive!
Jane, thank you for sharing your struggle with me…I can’t imagine having my image on a billboard….oh my goodness! One thing that’s totally in your favor my friend..you are soooooo photogenic! Sending love and a prayer for peace xoxo
You know, after spending time with you, I saw you as so composed, and confident really, in how you carried yourself. You’re so beautiful and light filled – that is what I noticed right away. I’m so happy you can lay this one down. Its a struggle and my appearance is changing daily- from losing most of my hair, to fake hair, to patchy short hair. I can hardly keep up with how I am outside- so I try to keep the internals the same- and maybe thats why I see your internals first too. There is something so freeing about the 40’s and now you have me looking forward to the 50’s as well 🙂
Vicky, thank you from the bottom of my heart for sharing what you first noticed when we met face to face. You are my inspiration in so many areas dear friend I love you to the moon and back
No judging here! About a year ago hubby and I were able to spend a week at the beach in Siesta Key, FL. It was beautiful! I was kinda surprised that I wasn’t worried about how my 55 year old body looked. I so enjoyed myself and the freedom I felt to not compare, but feel … dare I say it… confident about how I looked.
Thanks for sharing your beach experience with us.
Debbie, I love that you dared to say it…”confident about how I looked”!!!
Sending love…xo